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My Jeep, not my bike! Lol!
Lots of things have transpired in the past week. First of all, I was at work, offshore for the past 12 days and some drama unfolded on Facebook between my g/f and I while I was far from home and after much deliberation, we agreed to peacefully, but sadly enough, declare an end to our year long relationship. It was tough, but for reasons I'd rather not discuss, it is for the best and we shall remain friends.

Friday, Dec. 16 marked the 42nd trip around the sun for me and nowhere to celebrate except a small production platform in the Gulf Of Mexico...terrific. It will be several years before my birthday falls on a Friday again and I'll probably end up on a platform then as well.

I returned to dry land around 2:30 PM CST on the 17th and drove 2 1/2 hours to our Lafayette office to drop off time sheets, reports, etc. and then onward to Houma, another 2+ hours away to drop off equipment and then back home, yet another 3 hours of driving. All the while, I'm tired and quite upset over my relationship woes. Well, as I was leaving our Lafayette office, my girl called me while I was on one of the most congested parkways in the city. I should not have accepted the call, being that I was tired, and needed to focus all of my attention on the road with all of its holiday stop and go chaos, but I was hoping to reach some type of alternate outcome to the events that had unfolded days earlier and then it happened...BAM!!! I rear ended a car that had stopped abruptly in front of me...a BMW. And to make things worse, she hit the car in front of her which hit the vehicle in front of it.
I immediately realized that I had become at that moment, the epitome of which we despise...a cager on a cell phone. How could this be? With all I have learned and practiced over the years as an accident free driver!! It just goes to painfully demonstrate what circumstances can arise when a driver becomes the least bit distracted for a nanosecond.

Would this have happened if I were on my bike? Probably not. Why? Because I'm at the highest level of awareness and attention while on my motorcycle surrounded by cagers...plus, I wouldn't be on a damn cell phone!! I'm so angry with myself about this! Well, most importantly, no one was injured and everyone involved was polite and forgiving. So, what did I do to aleviate myself from the stresses of a dissolved relationship and the anguish of my insurance premiums about to sky rocket? I took a nice 115 mile tour on my motorcycle today!!! Did it work? Damn right it did!!! I don't know what made today so different from the other times I've ridden, but today somehow, I felt more alive and comfortable on the bike than I've ever been before! I simply did not want to stop riding! My throttle hand wasn't numb for a change and the pegs were dragging effortlessly around every curve as I was sticking to my line as though I were on rails! I saw some beautiful country side with cattle and horses grazing in fields as I passed by. I only encountered three other bikers on the road, but I could see it as I approached each one. They all had that look...the look of freedom with a touch of rebellion, but all offered me the sign of the brotherhood of motorcycling that makes me proud and honored to be a part of! Yeah...what troubles? :)
 

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Discussion Starter #4
That sucks man. Good Jeeps are hard to find. Peace man, hope the rough patch is over soon. Amazing what a decent ride will do for you, huh?
No worries...the Jeep held up wonderfully! Damage is minimal. In fact, if you didn't know I wrecked, you'd find it hard to notice that anything was wrong with it. And yeah, today's ride made all the difference in the world! ;)
 

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Glad you are unscathed and got a cleansing ride in. Sorry to hear of the Jeep but at least as you said the "damage is minimal."
 

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Been there

Glad to here it was not a bad accident, we have all had things happen and been in the same kind of circumstances. I hope it all works out.

A long ride is a good way to deal with problems.

I'm also more alert when on two wheels, it's too easy in a cage to forget how fast your going. I will say that riding a bike has made me a better driver, but still, it's not the same in a cage. It's quiet and relaxing, not a good combination for someone who has other things on their mind.

There are a lot more roads out there, keep riding.
 
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Up front here. I am being a bit glib. Very glad you and others involved are okay but it could have been much, much worse. You could have hit a bunch of HAs.:)
 

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Happy Birthday

You left us hanging with what happened with the girl.

Happy Birthday just the same. Sorry about your fender bender. You are only human. No great harm done, no one hurt. Anyway it sounds like this is a time for you to reflect on things.
 

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Sorry about the wreck and the girl. Happy birthday though, not to worry, your birthday will be on Friday in 2016. That doesn't sound too far.
 

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Glad to hear no one was hurt. Listen man, the girl thing ... there's plenty of them out there, don't get all hung up on that stuff. Look at the bright side. You get to return all the Xmas presents you bought for her and can use that money to buy farkles for the bike. Plus you can do whatever you want whenever you want without the complication of a relationship. Win win situation right?
 

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Listen man, the girl thing ... there's plenty of them out there, don't get all hung up on that stuff.
Amen to that, ride4321! And most times, the "work of a relationship" is not worth it!

Libertine, I really enjoy your posts. As I've said before, your writing brings me immediately into your worldview, lets me live life right along with you, and even better, makes me smile!

Now, some big sister advice: Let the girl go! There is a girl out there riding her own bike and she's perfect for you. She's strong and witty and spunky and genuinely open-hearted like you. When you find her, it will be easy and comfortable and secure. Just be patient.

Just recently you have changed and grown through your riding experiences and lucky for us here, you've shared much of this with us. You're learning things about yourself and your outlook is widening. (I don't think you're in full bloom yet! :p)

Anyway, sometimes sudden growth--especially when accompanied by off-the-chart enthusiasm--in one person can create walls in relationships, especially if the other person is not growing with you. (Of course, I have no idea what's going on with you two but I can only relate my own misadventures in romance to what I've been watching since your first post.)

Whatever you do, do NOT let go of your own joy thinking that you can save this relationship.

Smartest thing you ever did was to take that ride on Saturday! ;)

Oh! And Happy Birthday to you! :)
 

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Discussion Starter #13
Wow!!!
It's so humbling and comforting to read all of your replies! I feel great right now, thanx to your support, advice and concern. I'm dealing with things pretty ok. In my 42 years of living, I've been through this, unfortunately, a few times before, but I seem to pull through every time. I'm not going to say it's easy, but it's reassuring to know that each experience teaches me different things about myself and I gain strength from it, so if/when the time comes to make the difficult decision to let go, it's easier to recognize and to take action, so I can go on with my life.
Unfortunately, I had to recently make such a decision, but I had been preparing myself mentally and emotionally for months now, hoping that something might change and I wouldn't have to. As it turns out, my g/f has been struggling with her feelings toward me for some time and she was open with me about it, I was trying to give her time. You see, she was married for almost 20 years and that marriage came to an end a little more than 2 years ago and has left her devastated. I came into her life in October of last year and she thought for a while that I may be the "one," and I felt the same for her, but she continued to struggle. Several times a month I would wake her up from nightmares about her ex and the turmoil he created in her life. Often, she would be arguing with him in her sleep, so it's still a deep, fresh wound to her. A wound that cannot be healed by me or anyone else. Only time. Although I gave her plenty of time, patience, love, care and endearment, her heart is still not fully open to me and so it was inevitable, but regrettably I had to declare an end to it. It is less difficult to sever the ties than to continue with a one sided relationship.
We are still friends and I still have a place for her in my life, but for now, we must live our lives separately, at least until she can define her needs and desires in life. Who knows, maybe the day will come when she discovers what I really meant to her all along, but was unable to recognize at the time. Perhaps it may be too late, but I can't put my life on hold in hope of that happening. It's been said to me over and over and I must agree, if it was meant to be, no one can stop it...if it wasn't, no one can force it. The only thing I can do now is embrace the things I have in my life that make me who I am and pray for her to find her happiness in whatever or whomever that may be.
I am surrounded by many friends, a loving family and the desire to live a life fulfilled with pleasant encounters, long rides, good music, great food and lots of laughs along the way. It's not about the destination, but the journey. I try not to take life too seriously, because after all, we'll never get out alive. :)

I want to personally thank all who've replied so far and in advance to those who may offer their kind words in the future. It is wonderful to be acknowledged and accepted by all of the great folks here who don't even know me, yet keep me in their thoughts. My thoughts are with you as well and I hope that I can be of help to those in need if/when the time comes. Thanx, everyone for your time.

Jude
 

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Sparky beat me to it - I also enjoy your posts. You're open about your feelings, you've shared your enthusiasm, concerns, sense of humor and willingness to learn. And now, you've come to us to admit to something that you knew was the wrong thing to do, but you are contrite and, I'm sure, determined never do that again. We're all human, so be thankful that you didn't hurt anyone else, and weren't hurt yourself.

Happy birthday. Enjoy the support of your family and friends. You sound like the kind of guy that tons of women out there would love to have in their lives.
 

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The guys here are really sugar coating all this and I applaud them for doing it but they aren't really speaking from their heart. You got into a relationship with a woman that had issues from a past experience that hasn't had time to heal. Walk away now... in a year or two if she's still interested see if there's any improvement in her, otherwise keep walking. We aren't pawns to be played here, we only have so much time to do with our lives as we should. Never EVER look over your shoulder unless it's to see who might take you out at a red light on the bike. When the right woman comes along you'll know it then and there and you'll have no control over how that works out.
Enough of the sob crap, it ain't flying with me. She has things to work out, you don't, get on with it already and play the cards as they fall. Single life really isn't all that bad. Build yourself a shed and post pictures on that thread and we'll all be envious:cool:
Now, I've said enough I think...

Please don't ban me mods but someone needs to say it.
 

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I haven't been in a relationship in well over a year and frankly, I don't miss it. It's nice not having to answer to anyone or ask permission before you do something.

Right now, I'm yelling at the TV while my favorite hockey team tries its damnedest to blow a 3-0 lead. After the game, I'm going to wave my private parts at the raccoons hanging out in my backyard. These two things are difficult to do when you're in a relationship.
 
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