I half expected, when you said "Armchair owner" to hear you were riding a Goldwing Aspencade (sorry if I spelled that wrong) rather than a Nighthawk.
:razz:
Don't be too down hearted though, redemption is at hand. All you have to do is go into your local Triumph dealership, kneel before the counter and say the following: "Father forgive me for I have sinned, I have owned at least a honda, a quacker and a suzie since my last obsession." Taking into account your previous good behaviour (as having had a Norton), he will no doubt let you off with saying three "Hail Bonnies (full of grace)" and offer you a test run on a T100.
Having previously owned both a Wetdream and a Plastic Magot (I've had a couple of BSAs since - still, also hangs head in shame, preferably at the end of a rope), I had to flagelate myself with an O-ring chain and test run a Thruxton through a vintage bike show before I saw the light. I didn't mention the XS650 on the grounds of worshipping a false god - for this I would probably have had to take communion in the form of eating an old air filter ("body of Chr*st"), drinking holy oil (as purified in the sump of a Vincent Black Shadow, naturally) and reciting the entire New Testament according to Hinckley. If I can do it, anyone can.
Welcome brother Doghair. :-D