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The Dog has landed in America.

553K views 4K replies 141 participants last post by  BrewDudeBob 
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#1 ·
For those who have followed Dog's planned trip to America, here is just a couple days worth of news. If you don't care don't read this.
Okay, Dog told me what he looked like and that he would have a green T shirt with cute frogs playing on the front. Couldn't miss the bald head in the air port pick up line, pulled over, shook his hand and loaded the trunk off the dolly onto the bed of the truck (he brought a whole trailer hitch assembly from Aussy land in his baggage). Made me wonder.
As we drove toward my house I glance at the green T shirt. 1970's tie die and in America what the frogs were doing is porn not playing.

He wants to eat and asks if we can stop at Hooters right next to a huge Harley dealership. Says he wants to check out the wings and bikes. I am now starting to get a bit more worried.
We got to the bike shop and tried to buy his bike. His Aussy bank card wouldn't fit into the card reader. To big as their dollar is so much bigger than ours. But Dog did spend a couple hours with a 6' tall ex professional stunt rider who drives an old Harley. She is the clothing sales person. I think she was hitting on him but he didn't respond. So off to the bank to get money to buy the bike with. He has to set up an account at the bank. Works with a single gal from South Africa who does the account set ups. Very cute. I can't understand either of them when they talk as it isn't any English I have ever heard. But, it was very obvious she was hitting on the Dog. He seemed to miss that and I worried just a bit more.
Went with cash to get the bike this morning and the six foot Harley gal gives Dog an Art of Motorcycle coffee table book. Beautiful and it is free. Dog misses that. Then the salesman gives Dog a free expensive Triumph T shirt (no nasty frogs there). Looks longingly into Dogs eyes but again Dog missed that. I am very worried now. What is it with this guy?
I am to ride the bike back to my house as he has never ridden on the "Right" side of the road plus he wants to drive a 390 hp pick up down the freeway. The 6 foot Harley gal comes to take his picture next to the new bike and post it on their web site but Dog is in the truck with the stereo cranked, reving the engine so my picture is taken next to his bike and I will be Dog for the new bike purchase.
We get home and get on the bikes to go eat down at the ocean. Dog follows us as we ride the St with his new bike. He seems to have problems letting go of the left hand habit and accepting the "Right" Hand ways of Texas. Stepping on the brake when wanting to shift gear doesn't make the following Texans happy. Even worse is trying to stop and ending up down shifting. I now have grave doubts.
I will let you know how tomorrow goes.
 
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#3,616 ·
I've been enjoying this thread immensely... Staggering photos and the narrative is amazing..

I wonder though- When it's all said an done, and Dog heads back down under (unless he decides to stay-which he should- really, and we'd love to have him as a citizen!).. I wonder how he'll sum us all up in a paragraph/bar conversation or less- as a nation of people- to folks who may have never met an American nor ever paid us a visit...
 
#3,624 ·
I wonder how he'll sum us all up in a paragraph/bar conversation or less- as a nation of people- to folks who may have never met an American nor ever paid us a visit...
The Dog Institute of Higher Stuff has done considerable research on this subject matter whilst looking through amber fluids. (it stimulates the brain) and have a preliminary finding to report: -

"Americans are possibly the world's worst tourists, but are amazing hosts."

This has led to us in the think vat at The Dog Institute of Higher Stuff proposing a thesis, I would like to present the paper we did, but we used it to clean the beer stains accidentally after a heavy night of cogitation. The theory follows roughly along these lines: -

There must have been some sort of poll or popular vote taken at some time to determine the 10,000 most obnoxious Americans, and they have been put on some sort of government funded work avoidance scheme, smuggled onto jumbo jets and flown out of the country. These people are endlessly circling the globe in the guise of tourists, and the government wont let them back into the country.

I base this theory on the fact that I have not met any of these obnoxious tourists whilst travelling the vast and great land.





The theory is sound, The Dog institute of Higher Stuff (slightly more credible than the Pond's Institute) continues to strive to bring you quality observations like this.
 
#3,618 ·
I think you're probably in a stage of reflection Denis. There has been so much you've absorbed in these last 9 months. Alaska alone will take awhile to totally get secured in your brain. Throw in all the other stuff and I'm guessing it'll be a good few months at home to really get your thoughts gathered. I'm glad you're ending this with Britt and taking time to chill. Utah can wait till you return. Mellow for the last days here, hang with HAP, he's done wonders for your visit. Maybe ask before you leave if anyone wants to raise a glass but otherwise you're doing it right my friend.
 
#3,623 · (Edited)
San Antonio Riverwalk.

The darling Britt and I spent a couple of wonderful days in San Antonio, at a place called the Riverwalk Plaza. It is right in the centre of town on the Riverwalk, a quick stroll and you are right there in the middle of it, quite reasonable too, a tad less than a hundred bucks a night if you factor in the parking.

The Riverwalk is stunning, a real oasis right in the centre of town.


And here is a photo I attempted very late at night... 'nuff said.


A more sober shot.


The entire place is very tourist orientated with restaurants of all styles and prices scattered along it's length, this is where we had a Mexican breakfast, while watching birds steal the sachets of sugar, tear them open and eat them.


There is everything from five dollar bangers and mash at an Irish pub, to high class cuisine costing upwards of fifty a meal. True to the roots of the area it seemed like every second restaurant was Mexican, go figure!

Really worth a visit!

Must post about visiting the Alamo too, it had squirrels!!!!!


I got a few questions to answer first though...
 
#3,627 ·
Have had the opportunity to visit San Antonio twice and will always be ready to go back! I don't know anything about living there, but it's a fun place to visit.

I've spent a few nights at Durty Nelly's imbibing enough Jameson to think I could sing.

Both times I visited, there was a street musician who would stand up on one of those bridges playing the bagpipes. It was a kind of cosmic juxtaposition... all that great tex mex food, tequila and the sweet sound of someone strangling a cat.
 
#3,631 ·
Denis, Did you stick your finger in a bullet hole at the Alamo? Always blew my mind how close it is to the riverwalk right in the center of town. Hard to imagine it surrounded and doomed.. Great place to visit and a great excuse to get out of Houston for a few days (I can say that cause I lived there) Don't forget the spring SCR is the first Sunday in May.
 
#3,632 ·
At the Ace Cafe in Barber's infield.



I submit this photo as one of the best BHO historical documents with cheesy captions to date. Just imagining these two guys in one place kinda boggles the mind. (If your mind is easily boggled.)


On the left (naturally) the one and only Leftarm Logan. And on the right the man who never ate at Outback Steak House the whole time he was here... the renowned dogtired of the Dog Institute of Higher Stuff.





ps. I may have those captions reversed.



Your friend Nort.
 
#3,634 ·
Oh - That is not how I had you pictured Lefty. I had a mental image of a scruffy, mischief maker with oil under his nails and a smear of grease on his forehead. PB sandwich in one hand and comic book in the other.
 
#3,645 · (Edited)
Well, 852 miles latter, we returned home, half frozen, from a fantastic three day jaunt with South Coast to ride the vaunted Texas Twisted Sister ranch roads. As this is Texas, where everything is bigger and supposedly better, The sisters are the answer to that puny little road in Tenn., the Dragon. Not a stunted 11 mile run from no where to no where but a grueling 320 miles of in out, up down and ever tightening corners from one tiny town to another tiny town out in no where.

<snip>

You can not believe how great, fantastic, unbelievable it is to ride as hard as you want on such well kept roads. Scaring the pee wodden out of yourself on the whups hills. From the top to the bottom and 300 foot fall and back up the next hill in the 3 digits only to panic at the top as you can not see where the road goes.

<snip>
Good time had by all at the Sisters!

First up the roads, challenging, in the way that some of the great roads I have ridden were engineer designed and you end up riding the same 400 foot radius corner left and right for 20 miles or so. After the first half dozen corners you realise it is the same corner and same camber over and over, makes for good fast riding, but there is no "pucker effect" happening in ya pants every time you go into a corner hard. It is the same with roads you ride regularly, you tend to lose that pucker effect because you know what is coming, and the only way to get it back is to go at it at the limit and beyond, not always a good thing, can be exciting though.

Some of the sisters are "old" roads that have evolved from the days before the motor car I am guessing. In Oz we would call them old coach roads, where they wanted to get from A to B and would build the road on a constant gradient so the beasts of burden could pull the wagon or dray at a steady pace. This meant all the corners were different in radius, this makes for exciting riding, and makes you really think and look into the corners as your approaching them... "****ters, this one is tight!!!!" Your brain screams at you as you just keep leaning over more than you really want to.

Other parts of the sisters have whoop-de-doo's where it is a roller coaster ride and a game of nerves trying to guess which way the road turns as you breast the brow of the hill. I defy anyone with brains bigger than their balls to hold it wide open going over the top of one of these dips, I tried and I don't have balls that big. :eek:

A must ride if you are in the area, good fun and challenging.
 
#3,646 ·
Now Dog is not riding his trusty Bonny but atop my beautiful graphite lady Sprint. With her trick suspension and a few other nice things I consider her a true lady of the twisty road. Dog said she was a touch light in the feet like "light in the loafers?" I asked.
No, but the Bonny clomps along in boots whilst the ST uses slippers he responds. I still think he was being sexist.

<snip>

We have just a short time before Dog ventures homes
so we are going to shake a few of the other girls up in the garage and venture forth better dressed for another adventure further south, maybe toward Mexico so Dog will go home having ridden every type road possible. I will update any one who cares here in a week or so with tales of our next road trip.
As a few of you will know, I am loathe to ride other peoples bikes, I am just not keen on it. so it was a strange feeling to hop on HAP's 1050 Sprint and head off for a few days ride.

First up, I gotta say I behaved on it, seriously if I had a triple of my own I would eventually end up a giant red and grey smear up the tarmac. I couldn't help myself, if I got a bike that will do 140, I would do 140... a lot.

The Sprint is chalk and cheese to the Bonnie. Duh, that's a no brainer... from riding position to handling. The front end rake is steeper, so it steers a whole lot differently, not exactly intuitive, but a lot more responsive. I felt somehow "detached" from the road surface. (for wont of a better word) Initially it felt strange like the bike was treading very lightly on the road, where as the Bonnie marches down the road wearing Army boots. I don't know if this comparison makes any sense to anyone, but that was how it felt. Maybe it was the smoothness of the Ohlins suspension doing it, but I didn't seem to be getting the same harsh feeling and feedback through the bars and my arse as I do on the Bonnie. But it goes round corners like it is on rails, a lot different to Rosie bucking and doing all sorts of unnatural things under me as I engage in a wrestling match to get it to do what I want her to do, what's that saying about riding a slow bike fast...

Power is a hell of a drug. And HAP's Sprint is sorta not quite factory specs, it has had a bit of work, it goes well. Bit of an experience to ride a bike where the torque and power curve only starts to get interesting when you hit the ton, instead of being near out of breath at the ton. Definitely not a bike I should be riding, I have enough trouble controlling myself on Rosie, that said, might give HAP's Ducati Monster a run in the next few days!
 
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