For the 'low' side of the grips relay, tap off the headlight cut relay - that relay does exactly that - cuts power to the headlights for improved starting. That will at least get them out of circuit while the starter button is engaged.
(It removes the '-ve' return from the lights, not the power)
Next - do
this mod. (go to the second page for my preferred connection method)
It may well be your battery is past its best however but those suggestions will stand you in good stead regardless.